Kyle: Well, try on this little number.  Wow, your figure is just so yummy, you could try on just about anything in here and make it look super-duper!  Oh, and put on this tail wire, it's really flexible and SO sexy!

Black Leather and Ribbon Halter Top with Matching Skirt

Sarah: Wow, this is sharp, I love the tail wrap!  And the lacings on this top will definitely keep it in place! 

Eh, and you can really see my tattoo!  The skirt is great but the top isn't really me.  What else do you have?  What's really in right now?

Kyle:  The environmental movement is all the rage right now, and short of running around on all fours, this outfit makes a statement!

Sarah:  There's not much to it...

Kyle:  Try it on, don't be so modest!  Maybe you'll fall in love with the look!

Au Naturel, Velvet Green Leaf Breast and Matching Hip Ornamentation, Twisted Grass Body Twine and Seed-Pod Head-Dress

Sarah:  It leaves very little to the imagination!

Could you please show me something less revealing?

"The Suture", White Shimmer Fabric Gown with Silver-Blue Silk Suture Lacings 

Sarah:  This one doesn't feel right, the cut's all wrong for my body shape.  I like the side lacings, though.

Kyle:  Oh Honey, let me help you!  You have it on backwards!

Sarah:  No, I just don't like it.  White isn't a good color for me.

Kyle:  Then try on one of my favs, then, a real knock-out especially with your fur-tone!  It's called the Heartbreak, isn't it just gorgeous!

Heart-Break, in Red Leather with Gold-Tone Chains, Gold Chocker and "Invisible" Lacings 

Kyle: It would just look SO amazing with a nipple piercing, don't you think?

Sarah:  Which nipple?!

Kyle:  Oh, I HAVE to go help this other customer, but I'll be right back.

Sarah: Actually, I dreamt about getting a nipple piercing once, but decided against it: really, which nipple?  Rats have 12!  And Kyle sure is a stereotypically flat-chested little mouse of a male, isn't he?

This Heart-Break is kinda neat once you get used to it though, isn't it?  The back is cool too, and with these lacings... but it's a bit over-board for the concert. 

Kyle:  I LOVE that on you, it's perfect!  But I see you're not quite in your happy place... try on this, it's called "Smiley".

"Smiley", Black Fur-Coated Wire Bra with Purple Carnival Skirt and Black Sawtooth Leather Choker

Sarah: Oh, this is so not me, I look like a clown from Hell!  Plus it's really uncomfortable!

Kyle: Uncomfortable? Well, I can see why... But if you want to try something really risqué, how's this?

"Teeter", Black Leather Sawtooth Brassiere with Pearl Nipples and Silver Chain Attachment with Narrow Cut Sawtooth "Panties"

Sarah: This is too bizarre for me...

Kyle:  Oh wait, you haven't seen the best part!  You can move the chains around like so...

Sarah: HEY!

Kyle:  Sorry!  And attach it to your piercing!

S&M "Teeter"

Sarah:  This is outrageous!  And if something were to snag on the chain?!

Kyle: That's all part of the experience, honey!  But seriously, it's for the extreme crowd...  Let me show you some vinyl and plastic gems we just got in!  

Sarah:  That's worn only by very wily, young Rats, along with ear tattoos and nose rings!  I'm not too keen on it, even though garage bags always remind me of naughty food!  

Kyle:  Oh come ON, you're here, you're naked, give it a whirl!  Why else did you come but to try something you've never tried before?  

Plastique, a Cut and Knotted Black Plastic One-Piece Dress

Punctured Plastique, a Cut, Ripped and Knotted Black Plastic One-Piece Dress

Kyle:  And lastly...

"The Breastbone", Bleached Cat-Bone Harness Plate with Black Plastic Straps and Bra, with a Torn and Knotted Skirt

Sarah: Ummm, no.  Do you have something with a bit more color?

Color!, a Playful Ensemble of a Red Fur-Coated Underwire with Gauze Bra and Green Carnival Skirt (Pearl Nipples Optional)

Sarah:  When I asked for something more colorful, I didn't think he could come up with anything less appealing!

Evergreen

Sarah:  This is okay but nothing special and it's that darn plasticy material again!

Let's go see the Hallowe'en collection.

Hallowe'en, a Fun Orange Ribbon Bra with Matching Carnival Skirt and Hallowe'en Motive Accessories

The Silver Death

Sarah:  Oh, this is from that graphic novel, the one they're turning into a movie!

Why is it that comic book heroines always have these huge boobs, I mean as if I could do battle with these melons in the way!

Sarah:  Okay, I've made up my mind:  I like the Teeter without the S&M additions and that great Leather skirt.  I think this is what I'll wear to the show!  

Black Leather Sawtooth Brassiere with Choker Tie and a Black Leather Slit Skirt with Side-Tie, Gold-tone Wire Tail Wrap and Dangly Black and Silver Ear-Rings

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What can I say?  I lived in Montreal for 33 years and never had the courage to try anything on in a sex shop (of which there are MANY).  Of course, I don't have Sarah Bratbie's figure!  So this is what I think it would be like:  weird, embarrassing, titillating, revealing, experimental, ridiculous, sexy, empowering and most of all harmlessly fun!  I think sex as a taboo subject has done a lot to create fear and "power-over" and maybe if we all could embrace its silliness and joy we wouldn't accept situations of subjugation and abuse.  Well, that's the thought anyway!

  Thank you to Sarah Bratbie for being such a great model and being very open to suggestions!  I stuck you with so many pins, my dear, you can have whatever Carol Heatherly ballroom gown you want!  Thank you to the real Sarah for making me consider that sex can be a pleasure to be sought after rather than just a biological ho-hum, although I still don't really appreciate the porn films you shared with me.  ;)  Thank you to Joe, most of all, for all the racy pictures and ideas over the years that obviously have been accumulating in my brain looking for some place to vent!  I guess this is about as close to the real thing as I'm going to get, guys, so thanks!  

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